Proceed
by KimYoshiko
Summary: Little glimpses into the lives of the gang following the events of the Long Game. (50 sentence meme)


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_1. vending_

Neku never really trusts vending machines ever again.

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_2. cherish_

His seams lie crooked and his stuffing sits rather unevenly in places, but Mr. Mew remains Shiki's proudest achievement.

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_3. condense_

_"Pi does NOT equal THREE, you yoctogram!"_

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_4. get off_

Even the most innocuous phrases, it seems, provide sufficient fodder for Neku's new partner.

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_5. timber wolves_

That stupid _Tokyo Jungle_ game comes out, and nobody in Neku's homeroom can _shut up_ about how cool it would be to have wolves in Shibuya.

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_6. dyed in the wool_

"Have you always been this antisocial?" Shiki demands, to which Neku only offers a halfhearted shrug.

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_7. booth_

The Slam-Off might have had more participants, if not for _that booth babe._

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_8. coffee_

While Beat retches in WildKat's bathroom, Rhyme bows apologetically to Mr. Hanekoma and explains, "I'm so sorry... he thought it was hot chocolate."

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_9. ah, crap_

He possesses the _highest level of authority in the UG_, the _strongest powers_, even the _ability to predict events, long before they actually happen_; but not even the Composer is immune from the sudden chill felt after hiking up one's pants, only to notice too late as something slips from one's back pocket...

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_10. walking talking disaster_

Shiki sighs while Neku pulls at his hair and screeches, "Why the _hell_ did you think it would be a good idea to set Beat up on a date with _Eri?!"_

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_11. stall_

"Just fix the damn thing!" Joshua yells as he holds out his dripping, nonfunctional cell phone, face redder than it's ever been or ever will be again, while Mr. Hanekoma lies half-collapsed across the bar, shaking with laughter, as he barely manages to gasp out, "You dropped it _where?"_

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_12. engage_

He knew what he was giving up—graduation, college, career, family—but he'd never had a problem with that, never _let_ himself have a problem with that, until the day he realizes that Neku is moving forward without him; and then, for the briefest of moments, something in his chest _aches._

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_13. pregnant_

That parallel universe exists and they do not talk about it.

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_14. what a waste_

Joshua's expression is almost wistful as he pulls the trigger for the second time.

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_15. diner_

Sometimes after school, Neku heads over to Sunshine Stationside, picks out a booth near the edge of the restaurant, watches people as they come in, and wonders.

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_16. sprint_

Sometimes, it's a giant shark that crashes upon them in his dream, exploding out of the concrete and asphalt as if they were water, and sometimes it's only a car; but either way, Beat is never _quite_ fast enough.

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_17. weepy_

Neku swears he's not usually the type, but something about seeing everybody standing around Hachiko, smiling, _alive..._

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_18. cold_

Normally, things like this wouldn't get to Joshua, but something about seeing everybody standing around Hachiko, smiling, _alive..._

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_19. I'm done..._

He can feel the other end of the pact fizzling out into static and realizes he's the only thing standing between both of them and certain Erasure, but as that damned elephant Noise rears up into the air, all Neku can do is shut his eyes and brace for the impact...

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_20. freaked out_

"For the last time, Yoshiya-kun, there is nobody there, so _please_, stop saying things like that, for Mama's sake..."

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_21. ashamed_

He swears, as the rough asphalt presses into his cheek, as his bullies' taunts fade into the sky, as the blood finishes settling into its pool by the side of his face; he _swears_ that he will become someone whom nobody will touch, ever again.

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_22. moth_

Even after the Long Game is nothing more than a memory, Joshua still finds himself following the trail of one particular soul throughout the city, despite knowing that catching up with it will only leave him burned in the end.

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_23. moaning_

_'Never again,'_ Neku thinks with a shudder as Joshua finishes eating his chili dog.

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_24. refuse_

"Even after the _hell_ you put me through... how did you expect me to be able to pull that trigger?"

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_25. damn you_

After many years and one too many drinks, Shiki gets her answer when Neku suddenly blurts out, "We were supposed to meet up at the mural... we were supposed to hang out, like always... what the hell was he doing, running into the street like that? What the hell was I supposed to do? Where the hell was I supposed to _go—"_ by this point, his words are almost too slurred with alcohol and grief to comprehend, "Damn him... god_damn_ him, whoever the _fuck_ he was..."

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_26. evening star_

Everyone knows Lucifer, and everyone knows very well what happened to him, but as Sanae stands at the edge of Perdition himself, he finds himself beginning to understand the reasons why an Angel might be compelled to throw away his wings...

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_27. want_

"To want nothing is to want for nothing," Rhyme says brightly, but after a moment, her smile fades and she admits, "but knowing what you want... that might be nice."

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_28. cancel_

Neku guesses that the number of times he wished to _un-_form a pact must have been roughly a gazillion.

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_29. ignore_

In hindsight, Neku isn't sure which was harder to ignore, the length of Shiki's skirt or the fact that Joshua's shirt seemed to be coming slowly unbuttoned further and further throughout the week...

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_30. t-shirt_

"Why, Neku, what a thoughtful—" _"JUST PUT THE DAMN SHIRT ON."_

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_31. lacerate_

"LACERATE, BEAT, THE WORD YOU WANTED WAS _LACERATE..."_

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_32. appointment_

"No can do, Phones," Mr. Hanekoma says with an apologetic smile, "he's... booked up, I guess you could say."

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_33. why_

Shiki catches Neku staring up at the blue sky over the Scramble, and even without words or a Player Pin, she knows what he's wondering; she offers softly, "Maybe it was you."

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_34. complete ass_

"He is!" Neku insists, although the fact remains that he _did_ preserve Shibuya and restore them all to life; "But it was his fault to begin with!"

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_35. grim_

Nowadays, she smiles, laughs, and seems to be living as blissfully and carefree as any other girl her age, but sometimes, Neku looks at Shiki and remembers that, once, she died.

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_36. infatuated_

"My, my, Neku," Joshua purrs as the battle ends and they fade back into each others' sight, "keep up the good work and I might just fall in love with you."

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_37. fine spun_

Neku is pretty sure he'll be dead, again, before Shiki and Eri manage to find the right fabric for their new project.

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_38. candy_

Another year, another Valentine's Day, and once again Neku systematically turns down every offer of chocolate made to him (White Day just gets bothersome, otherwise); but when a certain seamstress approaches him after school, he supposes he can make an exception, this time.

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_39. joker_

Rhyme knows that no matter how loudly Beat plays the fool, he'll always be supporting her in the end.

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_40. safe_

The Game is over, but that doesn't mean that they don't still dream about it, that they don't still find themselves fighting for their lives on planes of existence far from their normal reality, don't still wake up in a cold sweat from time to time, feeling their hearts race for so many long minutes; until they finally realize that they're safe at home, in their own beds, and that the Game is over...

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_41. relax_

After one night like that, Neku breathes a long sigh, runs his fingers through his hair, and picks up his phone off the nightstand because they all agreed that this was okay, that they could contact each other whenever one of them needed it, needed this kind of reassurement; he types off a quick text, all of which says, "Hey guys, just checking in, let me know you're OK, see you later."

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_42. evergreen_

The next time they see each other face-to-face is in Traverse Town, and even though only a few months have gone by, Neku still notices how little Joshua has changed, while Joshua catches a glimpse of the man that Neku will someday grow up to be; and although he doesn't show it, it hurts a little.

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_43. pencil_

Rather like two Players, Shiki thinks to herself, the sum of Eri's pencil and her needle is far greater than either of those things on their own.

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_44. contemplate_

Rhyme is a thinker, no doubt about it; but she realizes one day, that contemplating life can only get you so far.

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_45. emergency_

Neku is standing outside the smoking wreckage of WildKat when a hand claps him on the shoulder; he looks up to see Kariya, who smiles at him and says, "Sorry to bother you, Phones, but some stuff's been going down in the UG lately..."

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_46. force_

The only way to unseat a Composer is to defeat him, but as a small and rather weak young player named Yoshiya Kiryuu realized, nobody ever said that it had to be done by brute force.

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_47. carpet_

"My, my, Neku, I suppose the carpet _doesn't_ match the drapes after all—" _"JOSH, GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!"_

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_48. ready_

She thought that she was ready to die; but now, more than ever, she finds herself ready to live.

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_49. lollipop_

Uzuki manages to pinch one of Kariya's lollipops, only to immediately spit it out when she realizes that it's _bean paste_-flavored; "How old are you, anyway?!" she yells, to which Kariya just shrugs and grins.

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_50. I love you_

They're the same streets that existed yesterday, and the same people who walk upon them; the same buildings, and the same dumb fads flashing across their billboards. But as Neku makes his way through Shibuya today, he knows how close it came to vanishing altogether, how close _he_ came to losing, not only his _own_ world, but the world of hundreds of thousands of people he hasn't yet had the chance to meet, people he didn't know he _loved_—because he loves it, doesn't he, the city, the people, his friends, _himself..._ and with that knowledge in hand, Neku proceeds.

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Bonus:

_51. I loved you_

I loved you, and that's why I couldn't tell you, because to tell you would cause you to suffer, too, and I couldn't bear the thought of that, you suffering on my behalf (that wasn't how it was supposed to go, that wasn't how it was going to be).

But I was wrong, and instead I _lost_ you, and until I lost you I didn't realize how much I _needed_ you, and how much, it turned out, that you needed me, too.

So what did I do? Tried to take myself away from you, again (how _stupid _of me), believing that I was erasing your and my suffering—or maybe I couldn't see past my own suffering, after all. I tried, I really tried, but like death, _real_ death, some things can't be exchanged.

_What was I doing? What were you supposed to do? Where were you supposed to _go?...

I'm sorry I left you with those questions. Here are my answers.

I loved you.

Don't look back.

Proceed.


End file.
